One of the best parts of the week is looking at my WordPress stats on the back-end of my blog. Yes, it tells me who is reading the blog, how many seconds or minutes people stay on each page and whether any of my links have been clicked on. And that is all well and good. But what I'm really there for is entertainment. And I find that in the "Search Engine Terms" section. This, my friends, is a comprehensive list of every search engine term entered into Google or Yahoo, et. al that ended up leading someone to click on my blog, Cupcakes, Sprinkles and Other Happy Things, at jennysimmons.com.
This is true entertainment. So, below is a sampling of the most current search engine terms people have used to wind up on my blog and my off-the-cuff responses to each one. Enjoy.
SEARCH ENGINE TERMS:
discovery of reality african jungle lady photo gallery: Seriously, I went to Africa, but that does not make me "an African Jungle lady." Kudos to whoever she is though.
jenny simmons honeymoon: Creepy.
bird sprinkles: Good luck with that. Is an ostrich considered a bird? I'd go that route.
many gray hairs make me freak out: Me too.
I see a hummingbird outside my window is this a sign of me being pregnant?: I am totally not a doctor, but I am going to go with a definite yes. Still, if the hummingbird doesn't confirm the pregnancy for you, there are cheap little sticks at the store or a simple pee-in-the-cup test and blood work that a non-hummingbird-doctor can perform for you.
should i kiss her private parts: Absolutely not. If you have to ask permission, the answer is NO. Always no,no,no!!!
Girl that was homecoming queen, valedictorian but now in Uganda about to adopt 15 children: That would be the ever amazing Katy Davis, who by the way, has published her first book! Check it out on Amazon!
is Jenny the best Jenny in the whole wide world: Why yes! Yes, I am!
aunty acid-words of wisdom: What kinda aunt you got?
lexus jenny simmons: Dear Lexus, if you are reading this, I will gladly be your next spokeswoman. Please, for the love of God, deliver me from my 1999 Ford Escort ZX2.
jenny simmons has an amazing voice: Thank you.
obese birds: Of course our birds are fat (American birds, that is).
girl puts sprinkels on butt: I'm not even sure where to start on this one.
how old is jenny simmons: I am only telling you this because I expect birthday presents. Lots and lots of birthday presents! My birthday is November 17, 1980. Do the math.
roach growing in gums: Yeah, I've been there before.
prostitution addison rd: So sorry. I think you have the wrong Addison Road in mind.
meaning of don't look a stray dog in the eye: I could be totally wrong, but I think it means, don't look a stray dog in the eye. Where is it derived from? I have no idea.
why in my dream a duck chase me and tried to bite me: Well, there are 2 major ways to interpret dreams. Either the dream represents something in real life- something or somebody is chasing you, putting pressure on you, trying to bite you. Or parts of yourself are represented in the characters in the dream. So- you would be the duck. Part of you is chasing some other part of you, putting pressure on that part and trying to bite you. Two parts of yourself not working together in harmony. Or- you may have just watched Mighty Ducks or Donald Duck before going to bed. There is always that...
Do you have questions? You can always leave them in the comment field and I will try my hardest to respond! Happy Search-Engine-ing to you and yours.