Dear People With Money, I don't like to beg, but...
Can I please, please, please have $5,000 for a really good cause? Please?
You know the auction I'm a part of this week supporting Porter's Call? Well, a new item has been added to the auction and to say that I've been able to divert my heart and soul from thinking about it day and night since I found out about it yesterday would be a complete lie.
I haven't! I have thought of nothing else! Day and night! I cannot eat! I am tormented! I want nothing more in this world! I'm in anguish! Please! I need $5,000! Please!
OK, whew, I'm through with the most dramatic parts of the begging.
Michael W. Smith has put an auction item up for bid.
It's called "A Tennessee Christmas."
It includes lots of things like spending three nights at the Gaylord Opry hotel, eating meals at some of my favorite places in Franklin and Nashville, even meeting Amy Grant and Vince Gill backstage at their Christmas concert. Could the package get any better?
Yes. Yes my friends it could... because right in the middle of all that you get to GO TO Michael W. Smith's farmhouse and his parents, Paul and Barbara, are going to cook dinner (for me) and THEN Michael comes home from his Christmas tour and he starts the fire and we (I am already speaking myself into this dream come true) sing Christmas songs around the stinking FIRE place and have "FELLOWSHIP!!!!!!!!" ("fellowship" is a direct quote from the auction description).
People. Look. I'm not sure what the rest of you did in seventh and eighth grade, but I'm here to tell you that I spent those wonder years reenacting the song Secret Ambition with my sisters in our bedroom.
Melissa was Jesus.
We crucified her on the bedroom wall.
Sarah was one of the Roman guards running around trying to kill Jesus in a loin clothe.
And me? I was dressed up like a rock star.
I was Michael. W Smith singing into my karaoke microphone,
"Nobody knew his secret ambition, nobody knew his claim to fame... he tore the holy veil awaaaaaaaaay."
We would quickly do a set change and go straight into an interpretive dance on roller skates that we made up to our favorite song off his very first album, "Could He be the Messiah."
"Could he be the messiah, miracle man, part of the plan? IT IS HE!!! The MESSIAH!!!"
Melissa and Sarah were angels. I was Michael. We were all pointing at something in the corner of the garage that we'd covered in white sheets to look like a ghostly Jesus blob, and of course, it was He, the Messiah.
We would move through the albums like we were replaying the most brilliant moments in all of musical history. I mean, have you seen the cover of Michael's second album?
It stayed on my bedroom wall for years. And the songs "I am Sure" and "Hosanna" from the ablum- I mean, these are life songs people. LIFE. SONGS.
I 2 Eye? Christmas Album (the best ever written)? Go West Young Man? Change your World? Wonder Years? The First Decade? I mean, I don't want to embarrass Michael so I'm going to stop there because that only gets me to seventh grade...let's just say he's still making hits and I, my friends, have been his biggest, most devoted, loyal fan.
I spent one too many afternoons writing the Mickey Mouse Club asking to spend the day with Michael as part of Wednesday Career Days. They sent a girl to Amy Grant's farmhouse for the day to see what it was like to be a pop singer. And I knew, I just knew they'd send somebody to Michael's place next. So I wrote letter after letter explaining why this would be a perfect career day for me.
Awe- childhood dreams that have been squished. Devastated I tell you. Devastated.
But now Ebay tells me that I can win a trip to sit around the fire place and listen to him sing Christmas carols and his mom and dad will show me baby pictures and cook me homemade food and we shall sip cocoa together?!?
My soul is in a tizzy. An absolute tizzy.
You think Kentucky Rose could be considered a Christmas carol? Rocketown, Place in this World, or I will Be Here for You? I'm sure these could be Christmas carols.
I simply must find $5,000.
End of conversation. I've never needed to win something so badly in my whole entire life.
Do I need a new car or a college fund for Annie? Yes. So, I'm not asking for just any ole' $5,000.
Nope, this goes straight to Porter's Call (remember, the amazing ministry that helps artists and their families deal with our souls? Dallas Diva Day?). I more or less need a beneficiary who already wants to donate to this ministry and at the same time give me the dream vacation of a lifetime!!!
Hot cocoa with Michael W. Smith.
I'm shamelessly asking all radio DJ's who read this blog to:
1. Mention the Porter's Call auction that is ending this Saturday, September 18Th! With artists like Mercy Me, Natalie Grant, Fireflight, Jars of Clay, Addison Road and many other artists offering up exclusive artist experiences or memorabilia, this auction is sure to get every music fan excited. For more information, people can go to Porterscall.com to see all the auctions they can bid on.
2. Mention Dallas Diva Day! I want my auction to at least double! I'd love for it to triple!
3. And finally, most importantly, just let the world know I need $5,000.
Who doesn't, I know...
But seriously this is important to solving some unresolved childhood issues... like never having my dreams come true on the Mickey Mouse Club and working through the fact that I crucified my sister to the bedroom wall while singing Secret Ambition with slicked back hair...
Mr. Dave Ramsey? Big corporation? Bueller? Mosley?
You know you want your favorite INO artist to have cocoa with Smitty?!
INO could place the bid... Lord knows our label uses Porter's Call more than the other label's artists...
I'll even let you come and be a part of the family pictures if you want...
Well, if you wear a toboggan...
Just think about it!!!
Oh! Or take it out of the album budget for next time... so many options Mr. Mosley!!!
I'm done begging world.
Just think about it.
All I'm saying.