There is something refreshing about a chance to start over. That's one of the things I miss most about being in school...no matter what happened the year before, like how many C's I made, or how many times I was dropped on my head in cheerleading, how many embarrassing moments I managed to create for myself, or how many hearts I accidentally broke in a moment of flippant indecisiveness; summer always came, and August always promised a new chance at salvaging my social career.
It was a great feeling. And can we all admit for just a minute how amazing the first day of school is??? Ryan hated it as a kid and literally couldn't sleep the night before. He was worried about the new teachers, the new kids, where he would sit at lunch, who he would eat with, and I am sure, though he will not admit it, he was worried that whatever outfit he was wearing was not going to be cool enough.
These are the things I loved about the first day of school. A new Lisa Frank trapper keeper? New pencils, crayons, book covers. New clothes (only if they were at least 50% off and on sale, Mom refused to buy anything that wasn't on sale and to this day when I go shopping the full priced racks are non-existent to me, I don't even see them. I cannot even think of a time when I looked at clothes that weren't on sale...agghhh...the life of being thrifty! One day I want to go buy a shirt without looking at the price tag first!). But the best part was the new classes. New teachers. New people. New lunch schedule. Waking up that morning and putting on your most pimped out outfit you could put together, and knowing, that at least for one week, you would have cool lunches with Little Debbie's instead of off brand Sam's bulk cookies and might even get a lunchable or a juice box. Who I would sit with in the cafeteria never crossed my mind, I just wanted to see what was in my lunch and how many things I could barter or trade for.
It was a good day. And it never wore off. The first day of school, even in college, marked one of the best days of the year for me. It was exciting, new, challenging, and fun. And yes, I'm a dork; I realize it now that I am typing my thoughts out, but I loved going back to school and I got so excited that I would...yep, throw up.
And I miss that (not the throwing up). I miss having that clearly defined moment where you get to start over every year. As a kid, it was never new years, because it wasn't a new year, we were clearly in the middle of a year, and we were about to stop getting presents and go back to the same class with the same teachers, and New Years Eve was about the most uneventful holiday ever...whatever it was, it was not indicative of something new, it just meant we were closer to second semester, which felt like a lifetime away from summer, which ultimately just meant torture. So August was our New Year.
Anyways, the past few years I have been new years-less. I have not been able to embrace August as the turning point, though in a moment of desperation this year I went and bought a Lisa Frank notebook. And I have been too bitter to embrace the adult worlds official new year. New Year limbo.
But today, in a moment of grownup-ed-ness, I decided that this day would officially mark a new year for me...I made the lose weight plans and everything. And it feels good. Giving myself a new beginning, pushing myself to explore more things, to live more deeply and richly, to be aware of my life, where it has been, and where it can go and allowing myself to buy new outfits...after all, new years always start with new outfits.
And after a day of thinking, praying, relaxing, and making a list of things I will inevitably conquer for three weeks and then abandon...it feels like a new day. 2008. Definitely my year.
Then Ryan and I made the traditional black eyed peas eaten for good luck...and we ruined them. They were so salty that I am sure I will retain gallons of water for weeks, which will automatically sabotage the weight loss plan, and then lead to a string of unfortunate events.
If your good luck peas are not edible, is it a bad omen? If it is, it is a clear sign that the real new year is to be celebrated in August.
I will let you know. I hope you had a wonderful night ringing in 2008.