Jaded

Met Santa Clause this weekend. For free.

I feel totally jaded by the world because the things that stuck out about this experience were...free? You people brought out a real live reindeer and the most real looking Santa Clause I have ever seen in person and are going to give me my own polaroid picture of me and Santa Clause for free? I was convinced it was a gimmick and there was a catch. They were going to corner me afterwards for money or donations or maybe they would try to convert me to some strange religion or cult or church group. But in the end, I think they just did it because they were nice, happy, and Christmassy...still, I left not believing this. I think they've probably saved my picture, will identify me later on the internet, and come after me demanding some sort of remittance for that time I sat on their Santa Clause's lap.

I also felt jaded because as soon as Santa said to sit on his knee, I automatically thought, "what a dirty old man, what a creep!" There was a spot right next to him wide open, but he insisted that I sit on his knee. I mean, the guy had to be 70 and was probably a sweet man and it is tradition, you sit on Santa's knee and tell him what you want for Christmas. But I was convinced he was a sick, disturbed Santa.

So what should have been a pretty thoughtless process of me visiting Santa reminded me that I am officially a bitter, skeptical, grown-up. The whole time I was eying him and the reindeer and the elves suspiciously wondering who sent them, how much I would really have to end up paying them, and why Santa made me sit on his knee.

All the while I suppose they were wondering...why is a 27 year old girl waiting by herself in line with a bunch of toddlers and kids, wanting to come sit on Santa's knee so her mom can take a picture? Creepy.